I won’t name names, however, I suspect the certain someone who ate all of the good linen napkins and tried to cover his tracks by setting the table with recycled “goods” from the restroom wastebasket. On that note, sanitary napkins are only sanitary once, and have no place on the dining table, or anyplace in this establishment for that matter save for the women’s room bin.

Needless to say, I feel a major rite of banishing coming on again, and will not be held accountable for anything happens to any archive pets with names that end in “Horror”.

As for other things that need your immediate attention, I feel that we are in need of a handful more relics for the archive, for purely scientific purposes mind you – things which I recently learned of through some sort of magical hole in my newspaper, a hole about the size and shape of a crossword puzzle.

When I happened upon the SteamTeam section, I just knew that these objects were far too important to fall into nefarious hands other than those of the archive staff; I have collected a list of them, and their makers. Please secure these items immediately.

Dangerously Underpriced:

Steampunk amp by Steampunk 22

There is something incredibly wrong when something with this level of craftsmanship and beauty sells for such a low price. I suspect it must be cursed. Aquire immediately. http://www.etsy.com/listing/48618588/steampunk-amplifier-advanced-resonant

Reef Builder by Corina St Martin

Earth Fire Studios has in incredible amount of interesting wearable artifacts, rings, cuff links, and the like- but what really grabbed my attention is this brilliant and colorful painting, which at $1,000 for this level of work, leads me to suspect dark magick in the works. My office wall, of course, would be the best place for regular monitoring of this artifact. http://www.etsy.com/listing/38655519/original-mermaid-painting-the

Supernatural Craftsmanship

NewIndustries Light Passenger SteamPunk Airship brooch pin

NewIndustries Light Passenger SteamPunk Airship brooch pin: We must have this. Natural hands do not sculpt metal with such steady hand and attention to detail; Procure it – preferably before this Saturday night’s Advanced Metaphysics Gala. http://www.etsy.com/listing/38329795/newindustries-light-passenger-steampunk

Jolly Roger Skirtlifters by BoilerGoth

I don’t know if these really do what the name implies, but if they have any such magical ability it would be best if I had them in my posession, to protect the honor of the fairer sex. Apparently they come in sets of *two*. I shudder to imagine the sort of perversion that would would need to use this magic on two targets at a time. I must have them, preferably before this Saturday night’s Advanced Metaphysics Gala. http://www.etsy.com/listing/52926145/jolly-roger-skirtlifters

Azathoth Messenger Bag

A long time ago, Azathoth was like “Hey everybody! Sign in blood the Yearbook of Azathoth! I want something to remember you by!”, but when I went to sign his stupid book he said “No, sorry, there is no more room”. I *know* Keziah wrote something about me in there, I just have no idea what. Fetch me this splendid messenger bag, just make sure the yearbook is still in there. http://www.etsy.com/listing/48731287/azathoth-messenger-bag, or (her off-Etsy site) http://store.raygunrobyn.com/

GOLD BEETLE MECHANIQUE Steampunk Ring - Vintage Gold Watch Clockwork Scarab - Original Steampunk Jewelry by 19 Moons

I believe I saw this item in one of those moving pictures shown at the Purely Scientific Expo of Arcane and Dangerous Things several years back,  I believe its sting might gift a person with the ability to self-reanimate. If this is the case, well, I’m the only one of who has not yet achieved some form of augmented longevity, and I think it is only fair that I get *my* turn at not dying. http://www.etsy.com/listing/53280084/gold-beetle-mechanique-steampunk-ring.

Eerily Beautiful and Haunting

Adornments for Tarts has in their possession a number of quality and well-fashioned items for men, in addition to all of these wonderfully made women’s items, but take a close look at the photographs in particular… they are not only perfect, but something somehow beyond only “perfect”. I am left not only to wonder at the incredible and unnatural photographic skills of the photographers, but the degree of supernatural influence this Choklit character must wield to get not just the best photographers available, but several of the very best photographers available.

…Oh, and grab me a catalogue; This beautiful collection of images is in need of closer inspection.

Sirene Cuffs (Pair) by Adornments for Tarts - Photo by Lex Machina

http://www.etsy.com/listing/42698364/sirene-cuffs-pair

Absinthe Collar by Adornments for Tarts, photo by Aesthetic Alchemy

http://www.etsy.com/listing/19917298/absinthe-collar

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L’Oracle du Mort: One of many amazing clockwork pieces by Thomas Kuntz to be featured here in the Archive.

Thomas Kuntz, a professional artist for over 20 years, began as a sculptor of Commercial Toys, but later gained notoriety circa ’89-98 as a pioneer in the making of model kits based on old silent films like Nosferatu, The Man Who Laughs, Vampira, and others.

After a period of time Kuntz found that merely sculpting his dark creations was not nearly enough for him, and that he wanted to give life to his creations through mechanical, perhaps supernatural means… This change in method resulted in some of the darkest and most interesting automations known to man, and not nearly as many fatalities and disappearances as may be rumored.

You may have seen Thomas’ twisted creations in many places, though you may not have been aware of the crafter behind them, or the astounding degrees of meticulous craftsmanship responsible for their being. Mr. Kuntz’ creations have served in the armies and arsenals of many noteworthy people, interesting types such as Kevin Ogilvie, a.k.a. Nivek Ogre, frontman of theatrical post-punk industrial band “Skinny Puppy”. Thomas has made mechanical props for the band, and for Nivek alone, with pieces for use on stage, and for use in video.

In his workshop, Thomas Kuntz controls an army of clockmaking lathes from 1880-present, and each piece he creates is more said to be more exquisite than the last. There are only a handful of builders in the world who make automata, and no one does it like Mr. Kuntz.

“Death and Resurrection” (shown in the video below) is a self-portrait piece; One was sold, below are images of the artist’s copy.

The Alchemyst is a small but incredibly complex automaton who lives in a 9ft clock tower (pictures and video below). It is impossible to capture the whole moving tower inside the shop. There are many automatons living on and within this peice; on the top lives a procession of alchemists, a skeletal Templar knight rings a bell, libuse is a beautiful creepy princess who turns her head. The celestial clockwork and moon phases add even more life and motion to this large and complicated work of art. (continued below the following video)

This piece is the largest Thomas has ever done, and is one of several controlled not just by cams and levers, but an animation control system. All the movements are meticulously programmed in, and then put on to a “brain” computer that controls the servos, air, fire, and water effects.

Video of the Alchemist only

Video of the clock tower in action. The alchemist (clothed in this video) tells a story about a clockmaker.

“Fusion” (images below), another automation, controlled by clockwork, powered by hand cranking is a rather interesting piece in which two fused bodies dance around in dark and disturbing fashion (no video available yet).

The “Imp” is a stop motion character from a music video called Majik by Ogre. There are many more characters involved, but the Imp is the central piece. The entire video (below) was made by Thomas and director William Morrison.

The “Plague Hymn” is another beautifully creepy piece. Judging from the photos, it seems it would be an incredible piece to see in action. Hopefully there will be videos soon.

The “Levitating Head” Is said to be one of the freakier and creepier pieces to see in person. Thomas had a magician friend from London in the shop last week; For a few moments, he was astounded, and had a bit of pleasant difficulty figuring the illusion out.

Kundalini is another levitation piece, and was recently purchased by none other than Guillermo Del Toro, along with a new peice, “L’Oracle du Mort” of which there are videos of both (please see Thomas’ Vimeo page for video of “L’Oracle du Mort”, the link is listed at the end of this article).

Kundalini Video

Thomas Kuntz sells some of his smaller sculpted works on Etsy at anomalymachine.etsy.com, and you can visit his site (currently being renovated) at Artomic.com. He also has a video channel on Vimeo (including some Non-Work Safe automata videos censored on Youtube) as well as one on YouTube. Those are at (respectively) vimeo.com/user1180445/videos and youtube.com/haxanthrobo.

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Please enjoy the videos below, and if you would like to see more of Keith’s wondrous works, visit him at his aetherweb home Keith Newstead Automata – and be sure to check this space again next week, we have more amazing things to show!

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There are many, many new items here now, some even that he had forgotten to put in his regular store, some new exclusives to us.

There will also be many additions in the coming days by Bethalynne Bajema

Myke will also be putting up many many more originals here in the Archive over the next day or two as well, for those who like to collect original pieces – aside from what is already here, there will be a number of additional engravings of all sizes and themes, as well as some small scuptures and perhaps even some wood and brass works.

So, please do take a look, everything is one sale right now. I don’t think there is a thing in the store that has not been at least somewhat reduced. This week will be the very best time to acquire some original art, and a very good time to purchase prints and other merchandise as well.

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Travel Log, 27th of June, 2008, or 1908, I can never tell anymore.
Mechanical Insects in the Forest

A small path presented itself in the foliage and we used this spot to slip into the wall of green. About four minutes of walking into the forest presented us with our first novelty. Or well, perhaps novelty is not the best word. Aberration? No. Weird stuffs? Yes, we were presented with weird stuffs in the form of a thick old tree that was covered in clock faces. One would think there would be a neatly designed sign beside the tree to explain its strange shrine of visual time, like most strange or historical markers have in New England. But no. The tree stood alone in a small clearing and a vast variety of clock faces in just as many sizes lay hooked to the tree.

Upon looking a little closer it became apparent that not one of the clocks was keeping the same time. The difference in some may only be minutes, but the exact time was not to be had from any of them. Michael leaned in to have a closer look at this and jumped back as a strange crickety creature came between him and the clock face he was staring at.

Now, this creature looked like an insect, but its movements seemed very sluggish and labored, as though its small body was carrying nearly too much weight for its wings. Looking closely we could see that it indeed was nearly too heavy for its wispy wings, as its body was made of a gold metal. It landed on the top of one of the clock faces, fidgeted with its legs around the top of the clock till it got a strong purchase on a hook hanging from a nob on the tree. It gave its wings a frenzied buzzing before lifting off and taking the clock with it. The clocks surrounding the newly departed one all clanked back into place, leaving only a small spot on the tree visible.

Another metal insect of a different design came along and followed the same routine. And then another. We were so busy watching this strange display that we almost missed the large and labored beetle moving across the ground. He had gears sticking out from its bum and some type of circular reading glass on its back. Behind it it dragged a clock. Slowly it moved over the tree’s thick trunk legs and up the side of the tree. It found one of the empty nobs and placed the clock face on it.

The whole thing was very efficient and timely, this more obvious the longer we stayed to watch. But the whole thing was terribly surreal. I mean, to what purpose was this tree and its many clocks here? And who had crafted these mechanical insects to tend to the tree and its coming and going clocks? A mystery very tempting to solve. The only problem was the sun was starting to set, and long shadows were starting to darken up the forest. We feared staying much longer might lead to us not finding our way out again.

In a rash move, desperate for some sort of information about this scene, Michael reached out and grabbed one of the larger mechanical creatures off of the tree before it could fly away with a clock. The clock fell to the ground and its glass face broke. The glass shards caused the clock hands to bend and stop moving steadily forward. The strangest noise filled the forest as this was going on. It was as if somewhere in the wooded area someone was moaning over head and it vibrated within the trees.

As we tried to ignore this strange sound, Michael took his pocket knife from his back pocket and used one of the thin blades to remove the cover of the dragonfly’s back. Inside were more mechanical parts, lots of turning cogs and rotating parts. But resting neatly in the middle of all of this was a small, rolled up piece of parchment. Michael held the dragonfly’s metal bits apart so that I could slip my fingers inside of it and remove the parchment.

I unwrapped the aged looking little thing and squinted to read the very small script that was very elegantly written on the page. It read: Eleanor Patch, stolen time twelve minutes. Taken from her at four o’clock in the afternoon on a Tuesday. She is to be returned eight minutes of that, at three o’clock on a Thursday. The Fates are all in agreement on this solicitation and request.

At reading this Michael dropped the dragonfly and both of us stepped away from it and the tree. The bug turned, seeming to stare up at us from its mesh looking fake eyes. It soon recovered and took back to the air, rushing away from the tree. Another of the large beetles had come and was slowly dragging the broken clock away, while smaller, almost tick like insects were busy eating the remains of the glass and small clock bits.

The two of us turned from this scene and quickly left the forest the way we’d come. I think subconsciously we were trying to forget our steps as if to mentally brush dirt over the path we’d taken so that it would remain hidden. It was a strange sight and despite how beautiful the insects were, and the clock faces they tended, there was an overwhelming sensation of something being wrong with the area. Some mysteries are like that, and the sensation of wrongness is meant -to the wise willing to heed it- keep people away. We heeded the sensation.

Back home we tried to put the event behind us and simply watch a movie. The sound of soft gnawing on metal brought our attention back to the car. Instead of worrying about witch doctors and mechanics again, Michael simply grabbed our large and ferocious (in theory) feline, put his harness and leash on him, and took him outside to the car. He opened the hood, set the cat down and pointed to a pair of eyes peering out from behind the engine. “Nom noms! Get him!” He commanded the feline. There were a few icky sounds while Hunter rid the car of its new infestation of gremlins, but it was pretty clean when I went down to retrieve him. And thankfully we’ve yet to have to clean up any gremlin heavy hairballs on the carpet.

Like many of the things we encounter in our shared lives, Michael and I have been trying to artfully recreate the insects we witnessed and the clocks they tended to. Please find enclosed on the next page of this journal a few paint sketches of what we saw.

. .. . .. … .. …. .. … .. . .. .

Mechanical Insects in the Forest Copyright (c)2008 Bethalynne Bajema
Mechanical insects done by both Myke Amend & Bethalynne Bajema (c)2008
Insect and Clock collages by Bethalynne Bajema (c)2008

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“There aren’t any castles in the suburbs of Delaware and there aren’t any haunted mansions with gloomy mansard roofs, either, and because that fact was nearly too tragic for me to bear as a child, Winona Cookie came to comfort me.

“Appearing in a shower of cookie crumbs one rainy thunderstruck afternoon, she has been my lifetime antidote to boredom. While I trudged through graduate schools and internships, Winona has followed her own path, leaving a trail of fanciful stories, watercolors, ink drawings, collages and jewelry in her wake. She favors the darkest faeries, legendary women, arcane subject matter and inventors that never were. She is currently obsessed with the steampunk genre and is running me ragged with collages and stories. They are frankly beginning to pile up! We live in San Diego where I practice psychotherapy and try to find a place for my ill-tempered cat to sit in my studio.”

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To see more of Eliza’s work, visit: http://www.elizagauger.com

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Mixing equal parts Victorian horror, sepia erotica, clockwork logic and Industrial music, Beth carves her dreams on the skins of Tibetan holy men before transferring their contents to the computer’s screen.

Beth currently resides on America ’s East Coast with her better half, a rather bizarre little cat, a laptop, and her dark army. Online she can be found at Bajema’s Web or her online journal.

(Biography provided by John Galati)

Examples of Beth’s Work (Click on a thumbnail to see a larger view)

All images in this post are copyright © 2008 Bethalynne Bajema,
and used by this site with permission

Beth’s first collection of work is available through the lulu.com site.

Beth’s prints and various craft work can be found in Etta Diem’s Attic Shop

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