The Chuthlu Crush

The Magpie’s Bird Room

Of the many subjects that the eccentric shopkeep and researcher Etta Diem occupied her free time with, the topic of the Taureans and Saturnines fascinated her the most. If Etta was capable of falling prey to obsession these two entities would be that obsession. The suggestion of this is rather ironic, but only if you understand the nature of Taureans and Saturnines. Each of these titles is a quick identifier of a type of person who followed a certain course of action somewhere in their life and suffered the consequences. The most simple way to sum of these actions is to say the phrase curiosity killed the cat, although death is not the outcome in this case but rather a strange brand of unwanted immortality. (more…)

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At the height of the Spiritualist Movement when creators like Huxley Auspex were inventing their other worldy creations like the Auspicmoriscope, a more mundane line of invention was being attempted by brilliant creator Professor Semper Vogel. Vogel, not content to simply teach his knowledge and try and inspire the youth of his city to push their gray matter towards more profound things, he put his talents and intellect to the task of inventing machines that would aid the afflicted in his world. His first attempts were at a clunky brand of hearing aids. Most of them proved too large and impractical for the individual use. They were little better than the old fashioned method of putting an ear horn to your head and hoping for more hearing clarity.

After much frustration and failure Professor Vogel came upon an invention that seemed to conduct itself perfectly. The rather large invention was a reading machine, a device that could be placed over a page of written words that were read and clearly reproduced aloud from a speaking apparatus at the top of the machine. The professor hoped such a machine would greatly aid the blind in finally having access to books without needing someone else to read them to them, or waiting for them to be translated into brail. The only mishaps the good professor kept encountering were that the words being read aloud often times were not the words to be found on the pages. He couldn’t quite tell if this was a simple matter of the reader not being able to translate what it was reading, or something along those lines. What troubled and vexed him was the fact that what was being spoken aloud, though not what was on the page, was still a well thought out and perfectly understandable speech. It almost sounded like the reading machine was reading its own stories in place of what it read on the pages of the book or paper its reading eye glass was moved over.

As he grew increasingly frustrated with a device that seemed to be working perfectly and yet was not, he found himself one night spilling his woes to his sister Belle over several glasses of brandy and sinful truffles. His sister suggested he leave the reading machine with her and see what she could make of it. She was just as bright as her older brother, just as capable at construction and invention, and in this case she would be a pair of fresh eyes taking an equally fresh look at the machine. Vogel agreed and left his reading machine with Belle. (more…)

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As announced by Prof. Erwin Lindemann of the forum at brassgoggles, These televisors are the creme de la creme when it comes to modern Victorian Era technology – which would lead me to wonder exactly why they are calling it a “museum”, were it not for their wondrously artistic design and craftsmanship.

Of course such attention to aesthetics is today’s standard when it comes to quality electro-powered devices – after all, if it is not beautiful in its design, how could it ever be correct in its engineering?

The museum has near thirty of these incredible works of modern technology; Expect to see them available for ordering by the early to mid Edwardian Era, with customizations available as per buyer.

Visit the Televisor Museum via the wonders of the Aethernet

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The more eccentric tellers of origin tales claim Miss Von Swank was really discovered in 1893 at roughly 80 to 90 feet of digging in the notorious Oak Island Money Pit. These tales claim a stone box with a variety of strange engraved markings was found and brought to the surface. Upon opening the box nothing but emptiness was discovered, however the box was cleaned off and set aside so researchers could take their time studying the strange markings. The excavationer’s went to sleep and come sunrise were shocked to hear the gurgling of baby coos from inside the box. There sat the nude form of a baby happily playing with a very small and strange sliding wooden box camera. Explanations for how this child came to be here were wild and varied, even including a strange theory not unlike Schrödinger’s cat. When all was said and done the origins of the little girl were never discovered, but her gift for capturing the bizarre through the eye of her camera and the alluring and macabre nature of her craft cause most people to not really care if Von Swank is the product of blood raining from the moon or two uber-nerds getting jiggy with it.

Miss Von Swank can be found in the lovely and warm state of California bettering her photographic craft and working on specialized portraits or music videos. Miss Von Swank welcomes inquiries to work with her but cautions all to treat her well during these interactions or she might be forced to set her personal protection on you, which are rather vicious, hidden pokey-stick packin’ mechanical scarabs.

Please take a moment to visit Miss Von Swank at her portfolio: VonSwank.com
Photographs in this entry are copyright Robyn Von Swank, All Rights Reserved. They are reposted here with permission from Robyn. Many thanks to her!

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